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Reframing Our Expectations

31 Oct

Goodbye, October… Hello, November. (Where has the year gone?!)

I’m savoring these crisp and clear autumn days while they last—the climax of nature’s most colorful pageant. My favorite season indeed.

But it’s a melancholy season too. A time of reflection:

Every autumn, I find my thoughts curling inward, like the fading edges of fallen leaves, as another year descends to a close.

I can’t help but think about unfinished plans for the year, all that I foolishly hoped I’d accomplish and all that I haven’t yet done… Expectations can be tricky things, part good part bad, and we seem to spend most of our lives navigating that fine line between chasing expectations (what we want, what we think should happen) and embracing what IS.

When we tally up our highs and lows for the year, it’s easier to remember our disappointments and losses, isn’t it? (Even for happy occasions, we can remember what didn’t go according to plan.) Perhaps we’re focusing on the wrong things. What if our expectations, our perfect plans, prevent us from seeing joy and beauty in the ordinary and the unexpected?

“A writer for The Washington Post conducted an experiment to test people’s perception. He asked a famous violinist to perform incognito at a train station in the nation’s capital one January morning. Thousands of people walked by as he played, but only a few stopped to listen. After 45 minutes, just $32 had been dropped into the virtuoso’s open violin case. Two days earlier, this man—Joshua Bell—had used the same $3.5 million Stradivarius for a sold-out concert where people paid $100 a seat to hear him perform.

The idea of a person not being recognized for his greatness isn’t new. It happened to Jesus. ‘He was in the world,’ John said, ‘. . . and the world did not know Him’ (John 1:10). Why did people who had been expecting the Messiah give Jesus such a cold reception? One reason is that they were surprised. Just as people today don’t expect famous musicians to play in railway stations, the people in Jesus’ day didn’t expect Messiah to be born in a stable. They also expected Him to be a political king—not the head of a spiritual kingdom.” — C.P. Hia (Our Daily Bread, 10/31/11)

How often do we miss the work that God is doing in our lives because it doesn’t “look” the way we expect it to?

What if, instead of regretting losses and disappointments, I give thanks for where I am right now and celebrate the small gifts of grace I’m given each day?

After all: “It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful.” — Brother David Steindl-Rast

* * * * *

Is there a time of year that makes you more reflective? What expectations are you wrestling with this fall? How do you practice gratitude? I’d love to hear what you think.

{ Image credit: Bert Kaufmann via CC by 2.0 license }

Be Creative Every Day (The Challenge)

26 Sep

{ via }

Here’s what I’ve come to realize recently:

  1. I’m tired of gathering ideas and inspiration. (Yes, Pinterest, that means you!)
  2. I’m tired of seeing fun projects and thinking to myself, “I should do that. . . if only I had the time/money/skills/etc.”
  3. I’m tired of letting my creative talents sit on a dusty, “someday” shelf.
  4. I’m tired of feeling dull and unproductive.

And so. . .  it’s time for a change—a challenge, if you will.

One of my goals for the next year is to “be creative every day.”

That means creating something—anything—every. single. day. Whether it’s writing a letter or a poem (or a blog post!), cooking or baking, making music with Tyler, drawing, crafting, scrapbooking, taking photographs, or tackling a DIY project… whatever! Anything goes. (Yes, even rearranging the living room counts, because I LOVE to move furniture!)

I’m using this little-but-not-so-little “creative every day” challenge as a way to kick my creativity into overdrive and encourage myself to spend less time thinking/planning/wishing/dreaming and more time doing.

{ Great, now I sound like a Home Depot commercial. *sigh* }

{ via Pinterest }

Some people might call this an impractical (and un-achievable) challenge, and they’re right, in part. But the goal here is not perfection. The goal is practice. I firmly believe that creativity, just like every other talent and habit, improves with practice. Creativity begets creativity. If I want to be a more creative person, then I have to spend more time being creative.

If you’re feeling stuck in a creative rut too, then maybe you’ll consider trying out this challenge for yourself. Go ahead. I dare you. A little more creativity every day can’t hurt anyone, right? (Unless we’re talking about glue guns and staple guns. Danger, Will Robinson!)

The bottom line: Life is short. Do more of what you love.

{ Source: Ali Edwards }

Tell me. Are you one of those crafty DIY people or do you feel creatively-challenged? What’s your favorite creative outlet? Where do you go to find inspiration?

P.S. I won’t bore you, dear readers, by showing you every little thing I make. That would be silly. But you might see me posting a little more often, to keep myself accountable and to share some of the best (and worst?) projects I try out.

Get Creative: Quote for the Day

6 Jul

{ A little inspiration for your creative journey }

Ira Glass on how to turn talent into achievement*:

“What nobody tells people who are beginners — and I really wish someone had told this to me — is that all of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste… But there’s a gap.

For the first couple years that you’re making stuff, what you’re making isn’t so good… It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not quite good. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. Your taste is good enough that you can tell what you’re making is a disappointment to you…

A lot of people never get past this phase. They quit.

The thing I would say to you with all my heart is that everybody I know who does interesting, creative work went through a phase of years where they could tell what they were making wasn’t as good as they wanted it to be. They knew it fell short… It didn’t have this *special thing* that we want it to have.

Everybody goes through that… If you’re just starting off and you’re entering into that phase, you gotta know it’s totally normal.

And the most important thing you can do is [to] do a lot of work. Do a huge volume of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week or every month you know you’re going to finish one [project]. Whatever it’s going to be — you create the deadline… It’s only by going through a volume of work that you will catch up and close that gap, and the work you’re making will be as good as your ambitions.

And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met… It’s gonna take a while. It’s normal to take a while. You just have to fight your way through.”

*roughly transcribed from its original source (video here)

___________________________________

What inspires you to keep going when you feel stuck?

How do you hold yourself accountable?

{ Photo credit: Jason Pratt }

Prayer of the Thirsty

2 Jul
“Whoever drinks the water I give will never be thirsty. The water I give will become a spring of water gushing up inside that person, giving eternal life.”
— John 4:14

My oh my, it’s been hot out there! With a scorching 100°+ heat index outside, the A/C has been working overtime the past few days.

{ How fitting that this week I’m re-reading Max Lucado’s Come Thirsty. }

Despite the heat, we spent our Friday evening picnicking on the grounds of the state capitol for the Des Moines Symphony’s annual Yankee Doodle Pops concert and fireworks. It was surprisingly pleasant after sunset with a steady breeze and plenty of refreshments to keep us cool.

One of the perks of living downtown is avoiding traffic & parking headaches for big events like this! As we walked the few blocks home last night, I had to smile to myself as I watched a couple of especially grumpy, honky drivers stuck in an hour-long traffic jam. I’m so thankful for living where we do!

Today and tomorrow, we’re walking over to the other side of downtown for the annual 80/35 Music Festival.

Even though it’s cooled down slightly today (high of only 86°!), we’ll be stocking up on plenty of water while we’re out and about this weekend. I’ve got my trusty aluminum water bottle packed & ready to go!

On a hot, sticky day, there’s nothing quite like a long, refreshing drink of cool water or a splash through the fountain. Ah, sweet renewal!

Hot, summer weather like this is a perfect reminder, of course, for the other vital piece of us that needs hydration:

“Deprive your soul of spiritual water, and your soul will tell you. Dehydrated hearts send desperate messages: Snarling tempers. Waves of worry. Growing mastodons of guilt and fear. [Do] you think God wants you to live with these? Hopelessness. Sleeplessness. Loneliness. Resentment. Irritability. Insecurity. These are warnings. Symptoms of a dryness deep within.

Perhaps you’ve never seen them as such. You’ve thought they, like speed bumps, are a necessary part of the journey. Anxiety, you assume, runs in your genes like eye color. Some people have bad ankles; others, high cholesterol or receding hairlines. And you? You fret.

And moodiness? Everyone has gloomy days, sad Saturdays. Aren’t such emotions inevitable? Absolutely. But unquenchable? No way. View the pains of your heart, not as struggles to endure, but as an inner thirst to slake–proof that something within you is starting to shrivel.

Treat your soul as you treat your thirst. Take a gulp. Imbibe moisture. Flood your heart with a swallow of good water.”

– Max Lucado, in Come Thirsty

Oh, so true!

I made myself another little reminder to hang on the inspiration board above my desk:

This is Max Lucado’s “Prayer of the Thirsty.” Take it and use it, if you like, whenever you’re feeling a little dry and parched!

{ If you’d like a higher resolution version, contact me. I’d be happy to share! }

* * *

Wishing you a safe and blessed holiday weekend! Happy 4th of July, everyone!

What Kim Kardashian Taught Me about Writing & How to Create a Meaningful Life

22 Mar

I’m always on the look-out for inspiration, and sometimes it pops up in the unlikeliest of places.

Yesterday, as I was cutting up magazines for an art project, I stumbled across this bizarre Bermuda Triangle of creative inspiration:

→ TIME Magazine, Kim Kardashian, and a tongue-in-cheek article about celebrity perfumes.

{ Unlikely, indeed. }

As TIME columnist Joel Stein sets off on a humorous quest to achieve greatness by creating his own celebrity fragrance (called “Snarky”), he gathers some surprisingly apt words of wisdom from Kim K. herself:

“The idea is to create something that’s a true reflection of yourself, so when you share it with people, it reminds them of you.”

Ding ding ding! (Did you hear that? It’s truth and profundity calling.)

I’ve been thinking a lot about passion and meaningful work, and this silly little quote about personal fragrance seems to sum up so perfectly what I’m trying to cultivate in my life right now: Authenticity.

We each have a story to tell, and the most beautiful work we can do is to live our story in a way that’s uniquely our own.

There’s no power in being what other people want you to be.

My greatest hope is that I can create something meaningful that might impact others in a lasting way—something to leave behind as a legacy.

Yes, it’s easy to get bogged down in the mundanities of everyday life, but what we do every day matters more than what we do once in a while.

Don’t let another day, or week, or year, slip away — pay attention to life as you live it!

Ask yourself: What am I doing TODAY to create the meaningful work I want to do? And then start doing the things that are truly important to you.

Leo Babauta said recently, “Empires are created with small victories.” The same could be said of building a meaningful life.

We don’t build a legacy in the distant “someday.” We build it now, one day at a time, by what we say, how we act, and what we create.

When I’m gone, I hope people can look back on my life and my work, and say, ‘That is so Erin.’

I hope the life I live reminds people of the real me . . . not the anxiety-ridden stressball that I so often devolve into when things get tough, or the unconfident writer who doesn’t know what to write next.

“Authenticity is a daily practice.” I’m slowly learning to be intentional and mindful of what I do every day. It’s not easy, but at least it’s a start.

Believe it or not, that quote—that Kim Kardashian quote!—is now pinned on the inspiration board above my desk, so I can look at it each morning and ask myself this:

What can I create today that’s a true reflection of myself? What can I share with others that will add some goodness to the world today?

* * *

P.S. Let this story be a reminder to you: Inspiration is everywhere! Don’t forget to look for it . . . What unlikely places have you found inspiration?

{ Photo credit: Martyna Borkowski / Rubenstein }

 

Get Creative: Quote for the Day

18 Mar

“Have patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot now be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything. At present you need to live the question. Perhaps you will gradually, without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer, some distant day.”

— Rainer Maria Rilke, in Letters to a Young Poet

{ Photo credit: "Castles in the Air" by Alessandra de Souza }

How to Fill the Creative Well

10 Mar

{ Photo credit: Feliciano Guimarães via CC by 2.0 license }

“Over the piano was printed a notice: Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best.” — Oscar Wilde

Some days are harder than others.

Like today . . .

Today, I’m feeling stuck. Completely and utterly stuck, in the middle of a dull creative drought: No ideas. No inspiration. No nothing.

On days like this, I’ve learned that sometimes the best thing to do is to shut my laptop and walk away.

It’s not about giving up; it’s about giving myself a break—to renew and refresh.

Because here’s the thing: You can’t create when your creative well is empty.

So instead of banging your head on the keyboard, or calling yourself names, or crawling into bed to avoid the problem altogether, why not go out and find some inspiration?

I like to call it creative input.

Take a walk. Read a book. Look at some amazing art. Go somewhere—even if it’s your own backyard—and look for something new. Notice what else is going on in the world around you.

Jack London said, “You can’t wait for inspiration, you have to go after it with a club.”

Go! Do something today to fill your creative well, so when you sit back down again later tonight or tomorrow or the next day, you have some new ideas to draw on.

Creativity, of any kind, doesn’t occur in a vaccuum. There’s no creative output without some creative input, so don’t neglect to nurture your inner artist. Give that creativity something to feed on.

I’m heading off to find myself some inspiration today. And in the meantime, I’m hanging this reminder above my desk: Please don’t shoot the writer. She’s doing her best.

What do you do when you’re feeling stuck?

Get Creative: Quote for the Day

7 Mar

“There’s no such thing as creative people and non-creative people. There are only people who use their creativity and people who don’t. Unused creativity doesn’t just disappear. It lives within us until it’s expressed, neglected to death, or suffocated by resentment and fear.

The only unique contribution that we will ever make in this world will be born of our creativity.

If we want to make meaning, we need to make art. Cook, write, draw, doodle, paint, scrapbook, take pictures, collage, knit, rebuild an engine, sculpt, dance, decorate, act, sing—it doesn’t matter. As long as we’re creating, we’re cultivating meaning.”

—Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

What will you create today, to add meaning to the world?

{ Photo collage by Ali Edwards }

What Would You Say to Your Younger Self?

2 Mar

“If I could go back in time and have a conversation with my 18-year-old self, the first thing I’d say is, ‘Lose the perm.’ Second, I would say, ‘Relax. Really — just relax. Don’t sweat it.’ For a long time, I was anxious and fearful that the parade would pass me by, and that someone or something outside myself had all the answers. Having finally reached a happy place — a happy accidents place — I want to share my story with others, to let them know [that] things aren’t as bad as they fear.”

– Jane Lynch, on her forthcoming memoir { via LA Times Jacket Copy }

We’re our own worst critics.

You know it. I know it. It’s no surprise.

It’s easy to be hard on yourself when you’re up to your elbows in worry about work or health or relationships or money or your overflowing to-do list—or any of the other daily stressors that make us crazy.

But have you ever noticed that tender place in your heart that softens a little when you think of your younger self?

Looking back, I can see how harsh and unforgiving I’ve been to myself in the past. And I wish I could go back and give that girl a hug and tell her that everything’s going to be OK, that she is OK. Like Jane Lynch said, Relax.

It’s so much easier to be kind to yourself in retrospect.

Maybe that’s worth remembering today. . .

Wherever you are, whatever challenges you’re facing now. . . Keep in mind that someday you’ll look back on this time with a bit more perspective. Yes, you might know better by then, being the older and wiser version of you. But you might also be a little kinder to yourself and maybe a little more forgiving.

{ Relax. You’ll get through this. Have faith. It’s all going to be OK. }

Maybe we should be that kind to ourselves all the time.

* * *

If you could go back in time and have a conversation with your younger self, what would you say? What did you need to hear at the age of 8, or 18, or 28, or 40? What do you wish you’d known then that you know now?

What lesson or assurance do you wish you could hear now from your older and wiser self?

{ Photo of me, circa 1990* }
*And yes, those are pink stonewash jeans!

Just Begin…

4 Feb

{ Photo credit: Tom Saunders via CC by-NC 2.0 license }

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

“The beginning is always today.” — Mary Shelley

Do you worry about your contribution to the world? Do you wonder if you’re doing enough? If you are enough?

Maybe you’re struggling to find your purpose in life.

Maybe you’re starting over, picking up the pieces from the last failed attempt.

Maybe, deep down, you know there’s something special – something really meaningful – trapped inside of you, just waiting to get out and make a difference in the world around you… If only you had the right plan, more time, more talent, more resources, a better idea to start…

The thing is:

There is no perfect plan.

There will never be a right time or a right place.

There is only RIGHT NOW.

Like all perfectionists, my tendency is to spend more time thinking and avoiding than actually doing — because I’m scared of doing wrong.

But failure is a natural part of life. No one makes it through life unblemished, and it’s impossibly unfair to expect yourself to!

Our imperfections are what make us real, what make us unique, and what make us strong. No one else has had to overcome exactly what you had to overcome to get to where you are right now. No one else has your exact combination of experiences and interests and talents and fears.

The more we try to hide our imperfections, the further away we get from who we truly are.

Don’t let your fear of failure hold you back from doing the meaningful work you were put on this earth to do.

It’s not the chances we take that haunt us most; it’s the chances we don’t take. So do yourself a favor and don’t hesitate any longer—start now.

Don’t wait for perfection. Don’t wait until you have all the answers.

The best you can do is to do the best right now with what you have, where you are, at this very moment.

Stop making excuses. Forget about someday. Forget the what ifs and the if onlys.

Be yourself. Be brave. Be gentle. Be open. You’re on an adventure. Trust in the gifts to come.

Just breathe deep and begin . . .

“Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.”

– from Leonard Cohen’s Anthem

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